7 Powerful Ways To Love Yourself This Week
We’ve all got a lot going on, and sometimes we forget what it means to love ourselves. Our lives are consumed by our jobs, kids, relationships, paying bills, cleaning, commuting, trying to remember to eat three meals a day…aahh!
It can be really hard to find time to take care of yourself, especially when our culture often equates self-care with selfishness.
The truth is, you can’t give water from an empty well. If you make time to show yourself some love, you’re better equipped to tackle all of your obligations and relationships.
It is so important to show yourself the same love you show your families and friends, but where do you even start? Here are seven non-cliché ways that you can begin your self-love quest this week!
Take yourself on a date
This might sound intimidating if you’re not the kind of person who likes being alone, but I promise, you’ll be glad you tried it. I used to be terrified of spending time by myself until I went to Iceland on my own for two whole weeks! That was pretty much the ultimate self-date, but you can start a lot smaller:
Go to the farmer’s market and savor some fresh fruit.
Bring your laptop to a coffee shop and get some work done (who says dates can’t be productive?)
Go see a movie.
Go get a massage or a manicure.
If you’re feeling bold, try taking yourself out to dinner!
Read a Book
Like, actually read one. From beginning to end. Not only are you giving yourself the opportunity to learn something and/or immerse yourself in another world, but you’re also dedicating time where you can just be silent. Our lives are so hectic, and a lot of us think, “oh, I’d love to be one of those people who read books, but I just don’t have the time.” False. Skip that episode of Friends you were planning to watch for the 800th time, and pick up a book instead.
If you reeeeally can’t find time, try audiobooks. I always have an audiobook playing while I’m cleaning the house, showering, driving… I love learning while I’m just going about my day. Audible and Scribd are great paid options, but if you’re looking to save some money, you can download Libby, which allows you to connect your library card in order to rent ebooks and audiobooks. If you don’t have a library card, go get one!! They’re freeeeeeee!
Also, if you don’t know what book to start with, Jane Eyre is probably the greatest self-love saga ever told, and it’s in the public domain so you can find it in ebook and audiobook form for frizzle (kindle, ibooks, google play, and the audiobook can be found on pretty much any podcast platform).
Create goals based on past failures
We all mess up occasionally, but that doesn’t mean we have to accept defeat. To use myself as an example, I’ve always wanted to learn Japanese. I took a Japanese class in college and failed, and for a few years, I was too discouraged to try again. This year, I was finally ready to accept that I failed once and try to move on, so I set a goal for myself to practice Japanese for 30 minutes a day, and I’m definitely learning more than I did my first time around. I’m proud of that.
No matter how long ago you disappointed yourself, you can always try again! And you know what the best part is? Those thoughts of “I’m not good enough”, “I’m a loser”, “I can’t do anything right” will finally be put to rest.
Unfollow accounts that make you feel insecure
When you’re having one of those days where you’re feeling a little insecure, there’s nothing worse than opening up Instagram and seeing a feed full of “perfect” people. If they aren’t providing you with any kind of encouragement or empowerment, do yourself a favor and hit that “unfollow” button.
Talk to a therapist
I am very outspoken about taking care of your mental health. I truly don’t understand how anyone manages to make it through life without ever seeing a therapist. I often hear things like “my problems aren’t as bad as some people’s”, and “if my coworkers found out that I saw a therapist, I’d be so ashamed”.
Nope. I’m not having it. Every person on the face of this earth could benefit from therapy. “But Nena, I don’t feel comfortable telling a stranger my problems.” Guess what? There are so many different kinds of therapy, some of which are more like a class and don’t involve you talking at all! Don’t knock it before you try it.
And if you’re worried about being shamed for taking care of yourself, those fears are probably baseless. No one has ever had anything negative to say to me when they found out I was in therapy. Even if they did, the only way we’re going to end the stigma around therapy is by normalizing it.
If you think you’d be more comfortable talking to a therapist over the phone, video chat, or text, check out Better Help or Talk Space.
Spend time with animals
Take your doggo to the beach, get your kitty a new toy (and actually play with them), or, if you don’t have any pets, think about getting one! OR, if that’s not a possibility right now, you can volunteer to spend an hour a week (or more) at your local animal shelter. The cats and dogs in shelters definitely need your love and attention, and you’ll feel good about yourself for bringing a little joy and comfort into their lives.
Try a Boudoir Shoot
A lot of people, if they’ve even heard of boudoir photography, think it’s just something brides do for their husbands-to-be. True, a lot of women give their husband boudoir photos on their wedding day, but it’s become even more popular for women to gift boudoir photos to themselves.
In fact, the majority of my clients have been single women who are on a self-love journey, doing their best to fall in love with their own bodies. To quote a few of these women:
“Nena did a fantastic job making me comfortable and confident and sexy. As a trans woman, I have never before felt so powerful and beautiful.” – Abra
“I recently did a boudoir shoot with Nena and had a blast! At first, I was a little nervous about getting fully undressed in front of a camera but Nena made me feel at ease and I ended up having a fun time! The confidence I got from doing the shoot was amazing and the photos turned out perfect.” -Bekah
“I think every woman should experience a boudoir shoot! They are so empowering! – Cat
I have seen first-hand, many times, what a powerful experience a boudoir shoot is for every woman. You’ll feel emotions you weren’t prepared to feel, and find confidence you didn’t know you had.
What are some ways you practice self-care? Leave me a comment letting me know what I left out!